You to me…

Dear Miss yet to come,

How you have been? I was a little busy these days. Busy trying to figure where this life is taking me. 

Everyday is a new journey, a new hunt for something even we haven’t yet conceived. There are moments when nothing feels right. We take many bad decisions, many relationships that suck out the best from us, leaving nothing but scars for life. We want to apologize for things done intentionally or unintentionally.However, it may not be possible everytime. Whenever, it’s possible we do. Life never stops. It goes on. These things may although sound too rough for anyone who sees them from outside but inside these are life wrecking. Yet we sometimes stay like a pillar for everyone who needs us.

You know how difficult it is to be like this when a storm inside you is laying waste to many houses, many dreams ruthlessly. I tend to collapse when nobody is around because for many I am strong, I am a person who listens and sometimes recommend a course of further action. It is so difficult for me to say no to anyone that mostly I am mocked by other people. My decisions most of the times are governed by my heart rather than my mind which turn to be instantaneous. They say you are a fool. You don’t know how the world is. Grow up. Be mature. 
These times are heartbreaking Miss yet to come. I have no one to talk to. These are the times I want someone to listen to me. These are the times I want you to just ask me what’s wrong because I will never tell you what’s going inside me. Believe me when I say ask, you have to give your full effort. I am sorry if it’s too much. I may be angry, may barge the doors behind me. But I will tell you. 
Miss yet to come, you have to be very patient with me because even I haven’t yet completely unraveled myself. 
Dear Miss yet to come, you have to be the one who is mature when you will be with me, you have to be the smart one, the intelligent one. Everything that we decide will be a decision in the end of both of us and never ever think that I am ignoring everything around because there’s a storm brewing inside me everytime I say something loud or maybe sometimes nothing at all. 
I know this is too much to ask because we all expect our life partners to be mature enough to handle a situation if not well, then diligently. I assure you Dear Miss yet to come, I can be hard as a rock in times of heavy fire and can be as soft as a feather when I will be loving you. You will just have to bring out the best in me Dear Miss yet to come. That’s all I ask. 
Everything else, I will take care of.

Waiting for you.

With lots of love.

Kumar Harsh 

P.s – I learnt new songs on the guitar for you. 

It started that day….

It all started that day,
Sitting by the Stream,
I had a dream,
I was a King of the places away,
Silent as the night,
I was to create,
A world with a mead,
Buildings were not so high,
People were not so shy,
Dreams had once Breathed,
My road is not your ride,
It all started that day,
World is a piece of disarray,
I cried,
I cursed,
I had lost all my verse,
My world is dying,
I was a ride without a brake,
Twists and turns,
Highs and lows,
People and days,
I passed,
Run along told me the roar,
It all started that day,
Sitting by the stream,
I had a glimpse,
Glimpse of the hoary past,
That stood behind me,
Held me,
Laughed, pierced through my skin,
Why do hurt me?
You are just like them,
They cringe, they shriek,
They stab the ones to whom they swear,
They laugh, they kill, 
All they do is breed sins,
Give me a chance is what I ask,
But how can I,
I am what you was,
I closed my eyes,
Let me sleep,
Dreams are just a escape,
Let me wake with a high so high,
Let me help you go deep in the night,
Let me give you a coffin to sleep,
Mark your grave with a stone of mine,
Don’t forget me when I go deep in the dark,
Remember me who was you in times not so new,
I will be your light when you go down,
Let no one bring me back to life,
Some people are better under the soil,
I had slept over the buried past,
Someone shook my head,
I had waken up to shining day,
Who are you, I rubbed my eyes,
I will be you what you desire,
I took his hands and took his clothes,
Let us make you what I am,
It all started that day,
Sitting by the stream,
I had a dream…..

Suraj….

ग़ैर बनके मिला ना करो तुम हमसे,
ख़फ़ा हो ज़रूर जुदा ना हो तुम हमसे,
बेकद्री मैं कभी अंजाने में वो गुनाह हुआ था,
गरजते तो बादल भी हैं कभी,
सूरज भी उनसे क्या कभी छुपा होगा।।।।

Gair banke na mila karo tum humse,
Khfa ho zaroor juda na ho tum humse,
Bekadri Main kabhi anjane main voh gunah huya tha,
Garajte toh badal bhi hain kabhi,
Suraj bhi unse kya kabhi chupa hoga…..

A dream….

Dear Miss yet to come,

Life is a puzzle we all are trying to find a solution. Everyday we wake up to something that we try to forget or something that we want to cherish. 

I woke up today while dreaming of a place set in woods, surrounded by the smell of nature, undisturbed, undisclosed, a secret kept hidden from the eyes of malice. It was cold and I remember the fire that you had lighted in that little fireplace we made together. It had now changed places. The Sun shone bright, spreading its rays indefinitely over the blue canvas. You were still sleeping. 

I took a cup of coffee from that kettle that I gifted you when I broke the one you had bought.(Sorry for that!) I held the cup and went out to see the nature wake up to the day. The river flowing made music with the fishes in its sheen, waiting for someone to applaud, the trees rustled each other into a hug, the birds clicked their beaks, the day had started for them. I went inside our little blue house (although I had to fight a lot for the color ;-)) Climbing the steps we painted together, I now recall how difficult it was for us to bring this into reality. The dress you didn’t buy, the journey we couldn’t sail, the match we missed. Don’t you think it is all part of that solution? We sacrificing everything for something that only we can see. This puzzle, this journey, this birth, all have been a myth that has carried many generations for many centuries onto a simple fact that everything is mortal. Immortal are the memories, the moments that we build together, the smiles, the cries, the fights, the days we didn’t talk. All, every, each. 

As I Reach the bed where you still are dreaming of me ( just kidding ;-)), I couldn’t resist but notice that little smile on your face. The same face that makes my day, that makes my home. 

You are home dear miss yet to come. Yes, you are. And if you are besides me, I am sure something beautiful will come out from this life, this puzzle….

Take your time Dear Miss yet to come. I am a true gamer and a true gamer never gives up. 😉 it will be fun looking for you. 🙂 

Waiting for you.

With lots of love,

Kumar Harsh